Stoene Boy in the Garden (Galiano)
Over the years of therapy and recovery we have noticed a pattern emerging. A number of us have been somewhat dominant at times usually because of emerging memories and/or issues each of us have been dealing with. Sometimes it has been a group of alters dealing with stuff. It has been somewhat amazing to see this process happen over and over. And it has been quite validating in the sense that it seems to confirm our multiplexity and the abuse.
Here are a few examples.
CF (Child of Five) (1)
Was the first of us to begin to tell her story. She came out with John, our counsellor at SAFER, many times in sessions and told him about the abuse that had happened to her. Her trust in John and her attachment to him was both soothing and painful and we feared for her. We knew we only had a short time with him as SAFER’s mandate was only for temporary counselling. We worried that CF would feel abandoned once again. When the time came to leave him and begin work with Lyn it was very painful for CF but we don’t think she actually felt abandoned. She did grieve the loss of John for about a year, a very long time for a 5-year-old but she also had a number of us to care for her and that helped tremendously. She also became good friends with Annie Charlie and that gave her a new focus and new life.
Annie Charlie (1)
Lyn “discovered” her before most of us noticed her. Annie Charlie was especially dominant for a period of time. She attracted a lot of attention both internally as well as with Lyn, Sarah, Lance and Graham and she absolutely loved it. She was a very outgoing little girl and quite cheerful. Kids’ Day was created because of her. At first we had decided that Annie Charlie was growing up and thought of having a birthday for her. After that we realized other kids were growing up too so we eventually changed it to Kids’ Day, a celebration (very much like a birthday) for all the kids 12 years and under.
Griffin-CHLD (1) (also called The Beast Within, The Beast of Rage, or Rage)
He became a focus early on. We envisioned him locked in a cage on the top of a mountain and we imagined that all of us had to travel together and free him from his cage. For quite a while we had to help him see that he was not a monster but a young boy in a lot of pain. We did a fair bit of artwork about him.
Tir (1)
Of course there has been lots about her over the years. She is our Original Person, the one who was born before any alters were created. She tended towards some kind of psychosis often as her own way of dealing with memories surfacing. It was extremely difficult for her sometimes to have us all emerging and remembering the abuse. She was often very frightened of the world and sometimes very sad.
Tee Tee (Timothy) (3)
Has been quite active for many years since his emergence. He has remained one of the most dominant Little Ones. He is currently 10 years old. He has been especially active with Lance and Graham over the years and we have watched him grow up over time as well. He is still very dominant and active and has many interests. He loves classic cars, and cooking (believe it or not). He also loves watching nature shows especially about wild animals in Africa. Tee Tee will be 11 on Kids’ Day in March.
Stoene Boy (6st)
Seems to have followed in Tee Tee’s footsteps and has also been very active for a number of years. He has also followed Tee Tee around a lot and looked up to him as a big “brother” and Tee Tee has accepted the role gladly. However, just recently Stoene Boy has a new focus – on Hartly. Hartly is about a year younger than Stoene Boy and he has chosen to be big ‘brother” to her. Stoene Boy will b 6 years old in March, on Kids’ Day while Hartly will be 5.
Little Ruby (4)
has also been somewhat active over many years although a little more in the background. But everyone once in a while she pipes up. Graham loves to yell her nickname – “Little Dooby!!” which she just loves. She also loves watching soccer with Lance. Her and Tee Tee have been best buddies too. When we are on Galiano she takes care of organizing the recycling. It’s her job.
Othel (1)
of course, has been very dominant and active since his emergence in 1991. Well he’s actually been dominant since his creation when we were 8 years old. He has been the one to do schoolwork and in charge of work at various jobs in our adult life. He is the great organizer and the boss of all of our projects, even weaving. He doesn’t do the actual weaving but is the one who mostly does the designs and paperwork for each weaving project. He tends to oversee a lot of our projects but doesn’t usually do the detailed work. He’s sort of the boss.
Ethan (7)
Is one of the Resistance and emerged much later. He created most of the alters in that group. He, like Tir, has also been psychotic in his thinking and very much living in the past until the last couple of years or so. He was terrified that Michael, the man who abused us in our adolescence, was still alive and would be coming to get us and harm us more. No matter how many times we tried to convince him that Michael had died a long time ago, Ethan seemed to “forget” and be lost in his fear of Michael returning.
Daffodil (4)
emerged at a young age, like Tee Tee and Stoene Boy. She is now 18 but still speaks with a squeaky voice as if she were much younger. We think she has simply been determined not to grow up in some ways. We will probably be telling you a lot more about her in these pages. She has a very strong relationship with Lance and also with Graham. Graham likes to call her “Daffodiddle, my petal little” which she just loves. Whenever we see Graham, she is the first one to hug him.
Katy Ann (2)
Has been one of our most prominent teenagers though she is in her twenties now. She had begun as a very angry and mean-spirited little girl but evolved into a young woman who is very sensitive and intelligent and caring of others Inside. She also has a strong relationship with Lance and Graham. Graham calls her “Spam Kid” or “Spamalama”.
Shell (1, 2)
has been forefront for a very long time and yet, unlike the rest of us, has not really understood who she is. Although she is split into four different parts, sub-alters, she still does not have a clear sense of these parts or her identity. We are much more aware of her different parts and who is “out” than she is. But she is the one who has recorded the most in our journals even though most of her writing has usually been affected and strongly influenced by the rest of us. It is also her who represents us, is our spokesperson, but is also the most “detached” from the Web. She is almost an Outsider and is called our Outside Person, the one who communicates and relates with Outsiders the most (but definitely not all the time).
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Well that’s some of us who have been in that spotlight. There are others we haven’t talked about but were in the limelight for a while. Razor Man (3), Black Widow (3), Misfit (7), Victoria (6mf), Ariel (1), Una (4), Angela (5) and No Self (4). This does not mean all of these alters were, or are, more important than the other alters. It is only that they have been more active and their issues more up front than others. Everyone of us was created for a reason and we celebrate each and every one of us. We all had our part to play and we all did what we had to do to get through. Although we may not “like” all of us Inside, we do care about each of us. We treasure each of us and we are very proud to be multiple. We survived and we survived well.
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