But I am not cold crazy yet
COUNCIL MEETING JAN 24/93
Both Tir (1) and Letty (2) are here today. Letty asked if she could leave if she felt like it. We said yes.
Tir
She is feeling scared and depressed. Scared because “the devils are still bothering her but at least they stay away from Baby Sarah (8)”. She says that when she goes for walks she puts Sarah in the tree for safety. Patience (1) says Tir is a good mother for doing that. Patience offers her the rabbit dolls to hold onto and Tir accepts. She rocks them and kisses them. We’re not sure if she thinks she is holding Sarah or the dolls. Guess it doesn’t really matter. Old Self (2), Flash (3) and Belle (3) watch over Tir almost continuously.
New group name
We have been calling us either “The System” or “Tir’s Clan”. Some of us don’t like either name. So, a new one. Suggestion – The Web. No matter where you are in/on it, you feel everyone else’s movements as the web strands vibrate.
The Little Ones
Ariel (1) has volunteered to be their main spokesperson. She spends a lot of time with Annie Charlie (1), CF (1), Julia (1) and Katy Ann (2). We can now include The Children of the Thirteen (3). Doing this makes Ariel feel more “useful” to the group and more important. We are all fine with this.
Children’s activities
Although the children can play Inside, in the Cocoon, they also want to do things on the “outside” as well, such as drawings for people. Sometimes this is difficult to do or plan for when so much is going on. Ariel says we can take it day by day and if she sees an opening she can simply ask us for the time.
The Children of the Thirteen – memories
We didn’t get to focus on them in our last session with Lyn. Belle (2), Rebecca (1) and Gabriel (3) did talk with the kids though to prepare them for the memories. However, not all the kids understand as they are too young. Gabriel says Belle and Rebecca are really helping as they are so nurturing and comforting for the kids. Also, Gabriel says Crystal (3) should probably be first to talk about their memories. She is the oldest and was the first of The Children to be created. He reminds us as well that it will be difficult for all of us. We will need all of our coping skills to get through the process.
Shell (1, 2) wonders why we don’t know all of The Children’s names yet. Gabriel says that each time an alter allows their name to be revealed, and each time a piece of information is put out to the Outside world, it is another layer peeled away, making us more visible and bringing us one step closer to our core pain. Nigel (3) has just allowed himself to be revealed. He is Alexander’s (3) Shadow. This was very difficult for him to do. Crystal and Timothy’s (3) Shadows are still not willing to be known by name. It makes sense and we can all see why it has taken us so long to know about each other and the things that have happened in the past. Patience says that she thinks we have actually moved very fast in the past two years.
Anger
These meetings could be a good place for any of us to express anger about things, even about each other. We must learn how to do it safely within the Web. Even the Little Ones might be angry and should be allowed to express it. They could do it at our meetings as well. The Mute (3) wrote that sometimes when we’re so angry we censor it so the dirty words don’t come out. She suggested she could write them down so they do get out in a safe way.
The group wants to stop talking about this. Many of us feel very uncomfortable even talking about our anger.
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