202. Brain as "Offender"

Left to right: Toopee, Baggie, Susie, Emmy

Brain (6mf) hurt Emmy, Katy Ann’s (2) doll, yesterday which really upset Katy Ann of course. She was so angry and hurt. She was mad at all the adults Inside and said she was going to retreat/leave Inside with Emmy but Caere (6st) came out (despite it being daylight) and said she would stay with Katy Ann. We accepted Katy Ann’s anger and her wishes. They were totally appropriate. A lot of us felt so bad about what happened.

The door of Mainframe got opened yesterday and there were some feelings that came up from Bone Bruised’s (6mf) memory of being raped. I think that’s where the stuff about wanting The Beast Without to die came from. Then Brain came out.

Oregon (3) wrote:

Brain was re-enacting the abuse to us using Emmy. He was present for the rape of Bone Bruised but distanced, on the “other side” of it. so no attachment to feeling, no connection with that little girl being hurt. There has been confusion about why Brain did what he did and one of us told  that Brain was reliving another memory of witnessing the abuse of another child and remembering The Black Wing Dove trying to comfort us but Brain said it was the rape of Bone Bruised that caused him to use Emmy.

In the session with Lyn, she suggested a mediation between “victim” (Katy Ann) and “offender” (Brain)but this caused Cast Iron Will (6mf) to get really angry, angry that she was accusing Brain of being an offender. He came out and in a low growly voice yelled at her that Brain was not an offender. It was accepted by us later that as a child Brain was not but yesterday he did offend. He did an act that was not okay.

Bone Bruised and Place (6mf)  feel very sad and responsible for what happened. The door to Mainframe had been opened but not enough protection had been set up for things coming up. Brain has been talked with and a meeting may be set up sometime between Katy Ann and Brain. Everyone is so sorry to Katy Ann and to Emmy.