INTEGRATION SINKS IN

as the days pass the feelings sink in deeper and deeper. our ego shield feels even thinner than before but maybe it never was very thick to begin with. maybe our dissociativeness made us feel as if it was tough and impenetrable. as well, the past floats to the surface and becomes more visible. we feel it more now, with an intensity we have not felt for a while. yes. it's there. and it hurts down deep. we feel so wobbly on our legs and afraid of the world. what will it do to us now? will it hurt us some more?

us 28 pull closer together, as if for warmth. the circle closes. yet within it lies the 154, deep within our embrace. us 28 are more active now too. more switching. more of us popping out. a fluid that was almost still waves back and forth, sloshes around as if someone has shaken this vessel.

we feel this. oh god we feel this.